What happened to America's work ethic?

Lately I feel like one of those people who, at the turn of the 19th to the 20th century bemoaned the modernization of the world and foretold the end of "all things of note".  But as I look around, I can understand how they felt.  I find myself looking at the world around me and wondering where ethics and self-discipline have gone.  I hear words coming out of my mouth that decry the lack of a modern work ethic, and I wonder how did I become "that person"?

But for all of that, I find myself wondering more about when this great country of ours became a nation of whiners and cry-babies.  Has it always been there and I just didn't notice before?  Or is it just becoming more pronounced because we have the internet and 24-hour access to anonymous commenting which allows people to say things that they would never say aloud to someone else's face?

I have my theories on why the modern American worker demonstrates less of an inclination toward really focusing on their job, and a stronger inclination to find ways to waste time during the day and to give a lower productivity quotient. 

First there is technology.  With e-mail and internet available on computers and cellphones, it is easier to get distracted from what one should be focusing on.  This is especially true when you don't want to be doing what you're supposed to be doing. 

My second thought is that part of it is the changes in corporate culture.  In my grandfather's day a person would join a company and had a pretty good chance of remaining with that company until the day that they retired.  The company, in return, took care of the employees.  They were people, not numbers, and the company didn't view the employees as being quite as expendable as they do currently.  But in the modern day the American worker is very aware of the fact that they do not matter.  Experience and skills are secondary in importance to being cheap labour.  Companies look at older and more experienced employees as liabilities rather than the resources that they truly are.  But even less experienced employees are seen as chaff, easily thrown aside to make the company's balance sheet look better in the short term.

When an employee knows that their company will throw them to the wolves without a second thought, that the company has no loyalty to their workers, then the employee rightly asks why they should have any form of loyalty to the company.  And in that begins the downward slide, with pride in doing a good job being one of the first things to go out the window.

It isn't just the big things, either.  When a company stops showing any appreciation for their employees, then the employees stop showing any appreciation for the company.   I understand that budgets are tight, but does it really cost all that much to have an ice cream social once a year?  Does it really cost that much to say "thank you" or "you are appreciated" in small ways?  I would bet that it costs less than having high employee turnover.

So I find myself wondering if Big Business in America didn't bring this lowering of standards on itself in some ways.  But then, in the back of my mind, that Little Voice speaks up.  I'm sure that you know the one that I'm talking about.  It is the Little Voice that tells us to step up and take responsibility for ourselves and our actions, even when we want to let our lower lip tremble and our eyes fill as we point over "there" and try to place the blame elsewhere.  In my mind, the Little Voice tells me that two wrongs never make a right, and that the only people the American workers are cheating by slacking are themselves.

I can't be responsible for how an employer treats me past a certain point.  I can only be responsible for myself.  I can make the choice to work to my full potential.  I can make the choice to keep my eyes open for new learning opportunities.  I can always make the choice to do the best job that I am capable of doing, whether I get any form of appreciation for it from my employer or not.  When I make those choices, I do not make them because it is expected of me, or because (as one boss of mine actually said) my paycheck is all the appreciation that my employer needs to bother showing.  I make those choices because at the end of the day, I have to be able to live with myself, and I do not want to live with a self that has lowered standards.  I expect a lot of myself, and every American worker should expect a lot from themselves too. 

Why?

Because, we're capable of better, and it is about time that we rediscovered the spirit that used to be commonplace in our country.  It is time that we rediscovered our pride.  I'm not talking about the false, flag-waving pride that politicians and media shove down our throats on a regular basis.  I'm talking about true pride, the kind that comes from knowing that NO ONE can do it better.

So, America, what have you done today to restore your pride?

I'm trying to figure out when things changed from polite disagreement to "I disagree with you so you are obviously not worthy of life in any form and should go away and die now you scum!" I mean, there once was a time when you could disagree with someone about politics or religion or other subjects and everyone would understand that it was simply that, a disagreement. The disagreement didn't mean that one person was essentially evil and the other wore a halo, it just meant that there were two sides (at least) to every viewpoint and there were always going to be people who supported each side.

Now I watch the political world with sadness and a longing for the days when disagreement was civil and polite. It really wasn't that long ago, I can remember it. Sure, things weren't as outwardly civil thirty years ago as they were during, say, the Victorian era but things were a darn sight more civil than they are now.

Have you ever read the comments on various news articles that appear on the internet? The article can be a fairly moderate story about something fairly middle of the road, and then the comments begin. People call each other names, they insult each other in graphic terms, and they rabidly blame every one of the world's problems on whichever entity they disagree with most. Some blame the President (whoever it is at the time) and some blame the "other" political party. Some blame gays, some blame straights, some blame Christians, some blame Muslims, and it goes on and on.

When did we lose the ability to discuss an issue with the intention of trying to find a solution? When did it become all about who is "right" and who is "wrong" without any thought given to how we can fix things? When did picketing the funerals of dead soldiers, or stomping on the head of someone holding a sign that we disagree with become acceptable? And they ARE acceptable behaviours, because if they weren't acceptable then they wouldn't be tolerated and wouldn't continue. But we see them, and actions like them, continuing every day.

If I had a wish from a genie, I think that I would wish that everyone from now til forever would receive immediate and appropriate consequences for every one of their actions. So if you make someone hurt, you get the negative consequences of it right then and there. If you rescue a stray animal, you get the positive consequences of it right then and there. Yes, this means that people will do good things out of self-preservation or self-interest, but you know what? I don't mind that if the end result is a nicer, kinder world. I'm just tired of how we seem to be spiralling down into this pit of cold-hearted negativity. The light of hope dims a little more every day, and that saddens me, because hope is such a basic need for humanity.

I wonder how many people will read this and find some way to be positive instead of negative? How many will take a moment to bite back words intended to hurt someone or degrade someone? How many will give a reasoned and thoughtful response rather than throwing more hatred against the wall to see if it sticks? I wish that everyone could be respectful of each other and the world that we are in, but every day I see evidence that respect is becoming a thing of the past along with (un)common courtesy.

I hope that I'm proven wrong, and that hope, respect, and courtesy all become part of our world once more.

Prayer - America's Last Hope

That was on several signs that I passed on the way to work today. I have to say that I disagree completely with that statement. I know what America's last hope is, and it's very simple:

Americans need to get off our collective arses and start working together to fix the problems that we see all around us!

Forget partisan politics (heck, forget the politicians altogether for a while), and the name-calling and blame game. Let those blow away in the wind and start treating each other as people and fellow Americans first, because that's what we ALL are. Instead of wasting time pointing fingers and casting blame for how we got to this position, why don't we join forces to start mending the things within our reach? When Americans are working together and of the same mind, we are the most powerful force on this planet. Unfortunately, the last time that happened was when The Greatest Generation came together and sacrificed so much for so many. I hate to think that it will take another full scale World War to get us all thinking as a nation once more.

I can hear you now. You're asking, "So, what is it that WE can do? The politicians and big corporations have all of the money and the power." Well, here are some suggestions:

1. Volunteer. I understand that we're all working harder than ever and still losing ground, but you know what? No matter how bad your situation may seem, there will ALWAYS be someone who is worse off than you. One of the best ways to feel good about yourself, and your country, is to contribute time and the sweat of your brow toward helping others. Give time to your local food pantry, help out at the local homeless shelter, find out where Habitat for Humanity is working and help them build someone a home. Don't just throw money at the problem (though donations to reputable charities are good too!), but honestly give something of yourself. Take something that you love to do and find a charity that can use those skills. There is one somewhere out there, there always is.
2. Clean up. Pick a section of highway and go out there with a garbage bag and some gloves, gather up the trash, and take it to the dump. Our country is our home, and if you can't be proud of how it looks, then it diminishes your pride in the sum-total of the country. Think before you flick that cigarette butt out the window (your car DOES have an ashtray for a reason, you know), consider what you're saying about where you live when you throw that fast food bag along the side of the road. Organize a group of people to adopt a section of highway and maintain it.
3. Meet your neighbors. When I was growing up, we lived out in the country. We knew EVERYONE on the road for miles in each direction. I think that's part of why we felt safe as kids, because we were never that far from someone we knew and trusted, even when we were a mile or two from home. When my husband and I lived in an apartment, we knew our neighbors and chatted with them as we all went in and out. When we first moved into our house, it took a long time to meet some of our neighbors. We took baskets of home-baked goods and home-made chocolates around to them at the holidays, and were met by pleasantly shocked expressions. No one in the neighborhood had done that before. That blew my mind. My family ALWAYS exchanged gift baskets with the people around us when I was growing up. I couldn't imagine NOT doing it. That's the kind of relationship we need to build again in our country. We've become strangers, encapsulated in our own homes, never communicating face to face with anyone any more.
4. Adopt a pet from a shelter. More and more pets are being abandoned because their families can't afford them any more. The shelters are full, and having to euthanize or turn pets away. Give a pet a loving home and in return you will receive completely unconditional love. On the days when you doubt that you can continue to fight the good fight, sometimes all that it takes to give you hope is the nuzzling of a cold nose or the rough sound of a loud purr, or a good game of tug-o-war to make things all right once more.

We need to find our hope again. We've opened the box and let all of these terrifying things out, and they're growing larger and larger, threatening to overwhelm us. We need to open the box once more and look for Hope. She's tucked back in the deep corners of the box, waiting for us to find her and let her comfort us. Look at my suggestions above, think of other things that you can do, anything to help Hope grow and heal us all and the country that we love so much.
Find your hope. We've lost it somewhere. We're a cynical, angry people. We need to find our hope again, somewhere tucked away in the deep corners of the box in front of us. Hope is in there, trying to get out and comfort us. Look her in the eyes and take in what she offers, then share it with the rest of the country and the rest of the world.  If we each do that, then slowly things will turn around and our country will become a place of honest pride once more.

I don't understand why things need to be "all or nothing" for so many people in the world. I mean, when you think about it, true "all or nothing" situations are extremely rare. Most of the time the world exists in shades of grey rather than black or white.

I started thinking about this today because of the church that is planning on burning a pile of Qurans later this week. They seem to firmly believe that all Muslims are evil terrorists bent on destroying or converting the entire world. The irony of this, of course, is that by maintaining that set of beliefs they are taking the same sort of stance that they claim to be against, and they are also providing ammunition for the few Muslims who ARE extremists.

A friend of mine posted on his Facebook that he feels that the burning of the Qurans is very un-Christian. This, of course, led to a discussion of the whole thing. Fortunately the discussion remained pretty civil and people were actually polite to one another rather than sniping or snarking. But there was one woman who posted a few times and was obviously one of the folks who either supports the burning or at least doesn't object to it. She said something that helped trigger the "all or nothing" question in my head. She said:

How come so much attention is being paid to the feelings of those from another country? More than is being paid to the feelings of Americans?

She said more than that, but this is the part that caught my eye. So I asked her a question (which she has not replied to as of this point in time). I said:

There are Americans who are Muslim too. How do you think they feel about seeing their holy book burned? Shouldn't that be kept in mind too?

With that question it all crystallized in my mind. Humanity has lost touch with our humanity. We don't care about others any more, we just care about being right. It doesn't matter if the target of the moment happens to be those from another religion, or another race, or even another subculture. All that we care about is that They don't do things the way that We do them. We are obviously right, and They are obviously wrong, so the important thing isn't to stop and think about what reasons They may have for being as they are, but rather to find ways to make Them admit that Our way is the Right Way.

I hope that humanity can find the way to put empathy back into our emotional arsenal rather than continuing to dull our empathetic and sympathetic abilities. I think that part of the problem is our loss of a sense of community. While communications technologies have made our world smaller in many ways, they have also served to widen the gulfs that divide us from ourselves. But I think that's the subject for another post.

For now, I hope that the few people who actually read this think about it and take it to heart, then start finding ways to empathize with all of those who share this world (humans and other creatures). I think that if we're going to save ourselves, we need to start there. And maybe lighten up on the "all or nothing" approach to viewing the world around us. Personally, grey is one of my favorite colours.

Steve Stanton, City Commissioner for Largo, Florida left the room with his head down before the voting took place that would determine his fate. The City Commission then went on to prove that intolerance and hatred are still strong in this country by voting 5 to 2 to begin the process of firing him from his position.

What was his "crime"?

Steve Stanton is beginning to undergo hormone therapy to change from Steve to Susan. He has struggled his whole life with his desire to be a woman instead of a man, undergoing therapy and trying other solutions. Now that he has admitted to himself and those around him that this is what he needs to do in order to be fulfilled and happy, the city that he loves has responded.

"If Jesus was here tonight, I can guarantee you he'd want him terminated," said Pastor Ron Saunders of Largo's Lighthouse Baptist Church. "Make no mistake about it."

I am so truly disappointed in humanity today. How can anyone be so hateful, so intolerant, so mean-spirited that they could say that a person who was doing a wonderful job one day is incompetent and unwanted the next...just because that person is changing gender? And the Pastor who made the statement above needs to learn more about Christian love and charity. If I were Christian, I would be furious that this man not only made his bigoted position so public, but that he had the audacity to speak for Jesus in such a way. Even for non-Christians, Jesus embodies love and acceptance. He went among the lepers and those that his own society had tossed aside as useless or unclean, and he showed that the very things that led to people judging those outcasts were the reasons that the outcasts needed love even more than everyone else.
Steve Stanton has given 14 years of service to the city of Largo, Florida, and in return they have thrown him aside like trash.

Largo...you are the ones who should be leaving the room with your heads hanging on this day, not Steve...or more properly, Susan.

A friend of mine is going through a possible job change, and an ancillary comment made by one of her respondents triggered a pet peeve of mine. So now I'm going to talk about that pet peeve. Just to make it clear, no one was disparaging or mean, it really has to do with the world's attitude toward Administrative Assistants.

You see, I know that there are a lot of people out there who take "just" an admin job until they can move on to the career of their dreams. They want to do tech work or be a manager or whatever, and that's great for them. Ambition is wonderful when harnessed and used productively. However, I find myself getting rather ticked off when people continually seem to take the attitude that administrative assistant positions are only filled by either people who are entry level and have no other skills, or people who are dead-enders, stuck in the position because they're too dumb or incapable of doing anything else. The implication that admin jobs are easily filled and easily worked really gets my goat.

The admin can make or break a company / department / team. If they're good, things run so smoothly that people don't even realize HOW good they are. They handle all of the details, anticipate all of the needs, and keep the cogs of modern business greased and moving in clockwork fashion. Anyone who doubts that has never had to deal with a BAD admin before. Anyone who HAS had to deal with a bad admin should know better and should treat their good admins like gold.

A friend of mine told me once that his favorite business instructor in college pounded it into his class' heads over and over again, "Treat your administrative assistant well. S/He has the power to make you look great, or to make you look horrible.". Well, that professor was right, and I wish that more people would realize it.

I am an administrative assistant. It's my job. I'm very proud of the job that I do. I'm excellent at it. I am organized, competent, pleasant, good with people, good at making people comfortable on the phone or in the waiting area, and talented at organizing offices and the people in them so that everything can be found easily and runs smoothly. I excel in anticipating needs, and am getting better at it every day as I learn more about this new industry that I've found myself in. I can fix office equipment, I can figure out how to get you on a plane for the cheapest price at the shortest notice, and I can call to re-schedule your doctor's appointment...all at the same time. I routinely perform a juggling act that would make Ringling Brothers performers green with envy...and I do it all with a smile.

I'm worth a hell of a lot, to be blunt, and it doesn't take much for me to know I'm appreciated. A 'thank you' or 'well done' now and then, being treated with RESPECT, being listened to when I have suggestions for ways to help the office run even more smoothly...oh yeah, and a decent paycheck. These are things that go a long way in showing that I'm recognized as a useful and integral part of the team that forms our office.

So no...I'm not "JUST" an admin. I'm a professional who specializes in making YOUR life easier. Respect that fact, and don't assume that I'm working this job because I am too ill-equipped to do anything else. This job is NOT easy, and the fact that I make it appear to be easy only serves as a testament to my abilities.

And if you really think I'm "just" an admin, then how about living without myself and the others like me who make things go? You wouldn't last ten minutes. I know this because I've seen what happens when myself and others like me miss a day of work.

"Just" an admin, indeed.

As I was driving to work this morning, I was thinking about the current round of reality shows. Now, I don't normally watch a lot of them, but the one about Superheroes is rather amusing. Last night one of the participants was eliminated, as happens on these things, and in his post-elimination rant he made a comment about one of the other participants that went something along the lines of "Like a fat woman is any kind of superhero? Puhleez!"

That gave me pause.

Why can't a fat woman be a superhero? Fat people in America deal with adversity and discrimination on a daily basis. Obesity is the last acceptable prejudice in our culture, and those who are afflicted with it face humiliation constantly. Seats in movie theatres and sporting arenas are too small to fit into, aisles on buses and planes are narrow, and we won't even go into the narrowness of airplane seats. I can tell you, however, that while you are sitting in your seat on the plane, dreading the flight because the person sitting next to you is large, they are not exactly having a picnic either. That person knows exactly what you're thinking. They knew it before they even got on the plane, and the look of fear on the faces of everyone with an empty seat next to them as they came down the aisle was repetitive torture. They're contorting themselves as best they can to keep from squashing you, knowing the whole time that it's a futile gesture, and that you probably don't know or care that their hips are bruising and numb from the seat arms and their legs have fallen asleep because they don't dare even shift for fear of infringing on your space even more.

Going to the grocery store or a restaurant brings even more judgement from others. There are people who will openly criticize the food choices of complete strangers. It can range from disapproving looks as the waiter brings food to the fat person's table, to loud "meant to be overheard" comments about how someone like that should be having a salad, not a steak. In grocery stores, a fat person's cart is routinely inspected by others as they pass by. There have even been instances of so-called helpful people actually taking items out of carts with words to the effect of "You don't need that, you should be eating healthier food."

Our culture implants shame and self-hatred at every turn when it comes to being overweight. Fat jokes are the last acceptable bastion of the comedians and the last socially acceptable sight gag in the movies. The derogatory images of blacks, women, and other minorities are slowly being removed from the realm of allowed but the images of the slovenly fat man in the stained t-shirt who sits in front of the television and chugs beer is still around and showing no signs of leaving. The fat chick is always the butt of the jokes, shown wearing muumuus and thick glasses, with bad hair and a pint of ice cream in her hand.

Is it any wonder that we have people spending millions of dollars on wonder pills as they try desperately to find a quick fix to their problem? Is it any wonder that we have children starving themselves and complaining about how fat they are at ages as young as six and seven?

The next time that you look at an overweight person and automatically assume that they're a slob who has no willpower, take a moment to realize what you are doing. If you just change a couple of words in that thought, you might find yourself shocked at your own thinking. (Examples of prejudices that are horrifying to most people: fat=black / slob=stupid / willpower=brains, fat=woman / slob=intelligence / willpower=sense).

Then there's the fact that, like the other prejudices mentioned, it's probably not true. It's much more likely that the person you are judging so harshly is just a person, like you or anyone else, who reacts to food differently than you do. There's a good chance that they're much more aware of their weight than you could ever be, and odds are that they're catching sight of themselves in that store window even as you look at them, and they're thinking thoughts about themselves that you would be appalled to hear.

Life as a fat person isn't all bon bons and luxuriating in your couch potato-ness. The real picture is that it's a study in self-hatred, self-abuse, and constantly being told by society at large that you're sub-human. Think about it the next time that you watch a movie and see the fat sight gag, because maybe it won't be quite so funny.