Wakanda Forever

 I don't usually have a strong reaction to the death of celebrities.  I mean, I have the same reaction I have when someone I don't know dies. I feel bad for their friends and family, I regret the potential that has been removed from the world, and if they die young I am sad for all of the things they didn't get done.  But overall, it's not a gut punch, not like when it's someone I actually know.

So today, when I woke up to the news that Chadwick Boseman had died, I was quite honestly surprised at how hard it hit me.  I hadn't really heard of him before he played T'Challa in Black Panther, though I know he'd done a couple of high-profile roles before that.  I just knew there was a new character entering the MCU, and that it was a character with a strong potential to be a game-changer for so many young persons of color.  It's important for people, especially kids, to see someone who looks like them portrayed in a strong, positive way.  

And boy did he do that!  Boseman's T'Challa was everything the character should be. He was dignified, but could laugh at himself. He was strong, but had vulnerabilities.  He was a hero, but made mistakes.  There was a gravitas that Mr. Boseman brought to the role that is undeniable. T'Challa was represented as a young man who had been raised to cherish and protect the people of his country, and of the world. He recognized the mistakes his father made, was angry about them because they were the wrong thing to do, and even at the end after fighting Killmonger twice for his life, he still offered mercy to the one trying to kill him.

My biggest regret for the movie, honestly, was that T'Challa's exchange with Killmonger at the end didn't go like this:

T'Challa: We may be able to heal you.

Killmonger: So you can lock me up? Nah, bury me in the ocean with my ancestors that jumped from the ships. Because they knew death was better than bondage.

T'Challa: No, let us heal you so that you can reunite with the family who should have taken care of you all along. We can work together to make the world better, to make life better for all those who need what we can offer.

Sadly, that's not how it went, and so we lost Killmonger as a character.  I know WHY they made the decision to end it as they did, and it was an amazingly strong ending. I just wish that redemption had been offered and received on both sides.

Even so, the impact of Black Panther in the MCU and in the real world are undeniable. A large part of that impact came from the man who played the character. I know there are other actors who could have done a wonderful job in the role, but I honestly will have a hard time ever seeing someone else as T'Challa. Chadwick Boseman made T'Challa his own. He leaves large footprints to follow, large shoes to fill. His legacy is one of power, positivity, pride. I wish we could have seen what else he could have done.

Wakanda Forever.

Serial Dreams

I thought I would share a snippet from a conversation with a friend via Facebook Messenger today. We were talking about the past, and where we are now, and I was talking about why my previous business, Fat Lady Foods, will probably never happen again, which isn't a bad thing, really:

"It might, but I'm tired. Part of it is everything going on right now, but part of it is that I've worked for almost 40 years of my 50+ year life, and I'm ready to just be done. I want to get the store to where I don't have to be here every day, and just take some time to do things I love for fun. That will include making jams and things, but will also be stitching, and fostering (mostly pets, but there's a possibility that we may open our home to foster kids at some point too), volunteering for causes I believe in, and just generally focusing on making the world a brighter place.

I've discovered that dreams are successive, not a be-all and end-all. You have one dream, you work on it, turn it into reality, and then you find another one and begin again, carrying the lessons you learned on previous ones with you. I think people should always strive to create and achieve new dreams."

So remember, we all get tired sometimes, but while we need to pause and rest occasionally, we also should keep looking for the next dream. One of my favorite quotes is from Louisa May Alcott. I haven't put it up here lately, but this seems like a good time to do so:

“Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.”

Follow the aspirations that shine in the sunlight. They're always there. Let them inspire you on the days when it's so damned hard to get out of bed. Let their light be the pinpoint in the darkness on the days when it threatens to close in and smother you. They're there, waiting for you to smile and dream when you see their beauty.

Assorted Miscellannia

I haven't posted here in a long time.  I'm due to get back into the habit, so this is my first attempt to do so.  I have so many things to talk about, but it's all swirling about in my head, so this time out I'll just be throwing a bunch of stuff at the wall to see what sticks.  More coherent blog entries will follow in future days.

The Trump Impeachment Trial begins in the Senate today.  I don't honestly expect anything to come of it.  His sycophants and toadies will do what is necessary to keep this a farce instead of a true trial.  It is so ironic that so many men who were willing to impeach a President over a blow job are now claiming that REAL crimes aren't worthy of impeachment.  Our country is broken and I'm not sure we'll ever really be able to fix it.  It's always had nicks and cracks in it, but we were on our way to getting those patched.  The current atmosphere, though, shows just how deep those nicks and cracks run, with hatred and bigotry so much more common than I could ever had dreamed. It's a nightmare, and makes me want to cry on a regular basis.  I used to believe in the basic goodness of humanity, but every day erodes that belief a little more.

My Dad's health is getting worse.  I live in dread of the day that I get the phone call.  I know it happens to all of us, and that death is a part of life, but that doesn't make it any easier.  Oddly, I'm more comfortable with the idea of my own death than I am with the idea of the deaths of the people I love.  Is that weird?  I'm not afraid of death for myself, and I'm not really AFRAID of death for anyone else, I just...don't want to not have them here.  I guess I'm selfish, but I don't care in this case.  I want my loved ones to live forever.  But right now I just want Dad to be happy and healthy. 

The store is doing well.  It's exhausting, and stressful (hey, there's a theme in this blog entry!), but overall it's good.  We exceeded our sales goals for 2019, and 2020 started off rocky for the first week but has picked up immensely this week and is looking good so far.  Who knew that Magic: the Gathering Pre-Releases could make such a difference in the financials???  But it's more than that, because M:tG was less than half of our increase in income last week.  The rest came from people walking in and buying other things.  A lot of them came over from the Arcade that opened across the street. 

It's very cool to watch our end of the street become such a strongly synergistic whole.  We've become Date Night.  People come down and get dinner at the sushi restaurant or the sports bar, then go see a comedy show, then meander down for a cigar, followed by a trip to the arcade for drinks and games, and while they're in there they see us and come across to do some shopping and watch people play Warhammer or D&D, then back to the arcade to close down the night.  All of the businesses down here are open late, especially on weekends, and we all make a point of sending people to the other businesses around us.  It's awesome to see it happening, and we make a point of letting the rest of Downtown McKinney know that it DOES work if you do this sort of thing together.  They all still close early though.  Their loss.  We'll take those evening and night-time dollars if they don't want them!

George Takei is coming to Dallas Fan Expo this year.  We're actually going to be there because we'll have a booth.  It's really tempting to print out a copy of my previous blog post that has an open letter to him about his fatphobia and bigotry toward fat people and give it to him.  I doubt he'd read it, and I really doubt it would penetrate his consciousness, but it's still tempting.  It's really disappointing to have someone who has suffered discrimination, bigotry, and hatred suddenly develop a blind spot to his own faults in those areas.  Especially when everyone around you idolizes him.  I don't hate him, and I'm not mad at him, I'm just...sad.

Other than all of the minutiae that are swirling around in my head, though, life is decent.  We're busy, the store is starting to pick up, and I'm hoping that it won't be too many more years before we don't HAVE to be at the store every day and I can at least semi-retire.  **crosses fingers**

Have a great day, everyone, and I'll be back soon to post something less chaotic!

Today's problems aren't stand-alones

"Saving our planet, lifting people out of poverty, advancing economic growth... these are one and the same fight. We must connect the dots between climate change, water scarcity, energy shortages, global health, food security and women's empowerment. Solutions to one problem must be solutions for all."

Ban Ki-Moon

I agree with most of this. The one part I don't agree with is the part about advancing economic growth. I don't believe that we NEED more economic growth. I think that we need to be more socially responsible within the current economy.

The ultra rich don't need all money they are currently hoarding. It can be put to much better use by making sure everyone has a safe place to live, nutritious food on the table, all necessary health care, and a healthy work/life balance.

The mega-banks and multi-million corporations don't need more profit, they need more focus on their employees job satisfaction and personal growth. They need more innovation, more independent thinking, and less of a focus on walking in lockstep just because "we've always done it that way".

Governments need less posturing and more cooperation. They need smaller militaries and bigger focus on the environment.

None of this needs MORE money. It all just needs the money that exists to be put to better purposes.

The world as a whole needs more community and less selfishness.

The Abortion Debate from My Perspective

It's been a while, hasn't it?  Life has gotten rather busy.  But there comes a time when a person can't stay silent any longer.

I made this post on my Facebook page, and it seems to be getting fairly popular, so I'm re-posting it here to make it easier for people to access.  This is how I feel.  If you have different opinions, go you!  That's what we're about in the United States, having different thoughts and ideas then working together to resolve them.

Note, however, that comments ARE moderated by me, so if you present an alternative viewpoint in a respectful manner and take the time to listen to others, that's cool.  If you are abusive, trollish, or otherwise cannot seem to manage an honest, civil, and adult conversation, your comments will never see the light of day.

Thank you.

My thoughts on the current chaos.

First, be aware that, like many women, I am barely holding onto the rage and fury inside me. Now is not the time for jokes or attempting to lighten the mood. That reaction, whether well-meaning or not, will lead to someone being caught in the flames that are unleashed.

It is time for this ridiculousness to end. Power needs to be wrested away from those who are abusing it. The irony is, of course, that they abuse it out of fear. They fear losing control, and as such they end up taking the actions that lead to those they oppress doing what the powerful fear the most. It leads to their power being stripped from them.

Before that can happen, we need to take the discussions back. Tonight I address the discussion of abortion, women's rights, and the debate about when abortion is 'acceptable'.

All of this is irrelevant to the issue. It is illegal to force an American citizen to give up their life or any part of their body, even if it is to save another life. These laws are even in effect after death. If someone chooses not to donate an organ, the government cannot force them to do so even to save a life. If someone chooses not to donate any organs upon their death, the government cannot legally force the donation.

The government cannot legally violate bodily autonomy, no matter if it is to save a life or not. That is what the real point is, and the whole ‘when does personhood begin’ argument is a willful redirection of the argument that is being unwittingly aided by the Pro-Choice movement.

Anti-Choice supporters are shifting the argument to where THEY want it to take place. Their argument is a smoke screen. It is not the true point. Quite frankly, it doesn’t matter if the mass of cells in the womb is viable or not, alive or not, or at any particular stage of development at all. The point of the matter is that every woman has bodily autonomy, and cannot be charged with murder when withdrawing consent for their body to be used by another.

This is my response to anyone attempting to make it about what is inside the woman getting an abortion. It is irrelevant. The only salient point is that EVERYONE has the right of bodily autonomy. Legally no one can be forced to give up their body or ANY part of it (including their womb) to another either permanently or temporarily. End of story.

Take the discussion back. Don't let them frame the narrative that way. Take. It. Back.

Our Modern Christmas Carol

America has always been a land of contradictions.  It was created to be the land of the free...unless you were black.  All men are created equal...unless you were a woman because, well, you're not a man (DUH!). There's enough land for everyone...unless you were Native American.  Everyone has the opportunity to make something of themselves...unless you weren't already rich.

Lately, however, these contradictions have reached a point where they are impossible for anyone with eyes and any sort of sense whatsoever to miss.  We have arrived at the Age of Willful Ignorance.

The wealth inequality in our country is worse than it has ever been.  We are losing ground when it comes to seeing people as human beings instead of stereotypes.  We're falling back into the time of the Rockefellers and the Vanderbilts.  This was a time when the rich believed that they deserved their money whether they had earned it or not.  It was a time when the vast majority of Americans struggled to achieve even the most basic needs and a powerful few wallowed in luxury.  The rich bought and sold politicians like stocks or bonds.  Laissez-faire policies led to massive deregulation of industries.  Pollution levels soared, giving those who were not wealthy even more reasons for ill health as they couldn't escape the cities for the countryside or afford doctors to treat the various health results of dirty water and smog-filled air.

“If they would rather die, . . . they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population.” 
― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

We have returned to the time when those few oligarchs at the 'top' of the heap have stopped considering their fellow citizens to be human beings deserving of basic human rights.  The masses are now viewed as interchangeable cogs in the never-stopping machine that exists only to make the rich get richer.  Many of the wealthy don't care that a man can die because his crowd-sourcing efforts to raise money for diabetes medication fell $50 short so he had to ration his medications which led to his death.  They don't care that people who have cancer have to stop (or never start!) treatment for the illness because the crushing medical bills are beyond their resources.

All around us people are suffering but the politicians are happily passing more and more legislation that will make things worse because their owners demand it of them.  Congress has become a place where one of the best compliments you can give is, "He's honest. Once he's been bought, he stays bought."  They take health care away from children in order to fund bigger tax breaks for the already rich.  Our so-called representatives think nothing of blatantly lying to the face of the public about how their legislation will effect the average person.  And they do it while going on about what good Christians they are and how they wish everyone else were as pious as they are.

They turn around after making these lies and do their best to rig the system so that there is no way short of armed revolution for them to be voted out of office or removed from power.  Gerrymandering has become the norm instead of the exception.  Any attempt to create a situation where the true will of the people is reflected by those in the government is destroyed before it can bear any kind of fruit whatsoever.  Obstacles are put into place that ensure only the 'right' voters will make it to the polls. A large mass of those 'right' voters have fallen into the trap set for them, voting regularly against their own interests in the unrealistic hope that someday THEY will 'pull themselves up by the bootstraps' and become one of the elite whose lives are untouched by the need to decide whether to buy food or pay the rent this month.

“Man," said the Ghost, "if man you be in heart, not adamant, forbear that wicked cant until you have discovered What the surplus is, and Where it is. Will you decide what men shall live, what men shall die?” 
― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

Every day men, women, and children die from causes that could have been resolved.  Illnesses go untreated because medical care is too expensive.  Hunger is a regular companion to a much too high percentage of the population.  Over here a child walks to school and shivers because they don't have the clothing to keep themselves warm.  Over there a man sobs on the corner because his family is in the street.  He tried to find work for over two years, but there was nothing to be had.  In that building there is a woman who falls exhausted into bed to get three or four hours of sleep before she has to be at the first of three jobs she'll work the next day in the hopes of putting food on the table for her family.

We are surrounded by people who live on the edge of survival, people who are only a short step away from complete disaster, and yet our country does nothing except encourage people to believe that these victims of circumstance have it coming to them because they are somehow unworthy.  Americans are encouraged to believe that there aren't really people who NEED help, but rather everyone who asks for help is simply lazy and greedy, trying to milk the system without putting in the work that goes with being a success.  We are fed the propaganda that people who are honest and do a hard day's work will ALWAYS have enough food to eat and a roof over their head, because this propaganda makes it easier to believe that people who need help just didn't try hard enough.

“You fear the world too much,' she answered gently. 'All your other hopes have merged into the hope of being beyond the chance of its sordid reproach. I have seen your nobler aspirations fall off, one by one, until the master passion, Gain, engrosses you. Have I not?” 
― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

Greed and self-interest are the defining traits of our time.  Americans talk a good game when it comes to charity and generosity, but the practical truth is that if it doesn't directly effect us, the vast majority just don't have the ambition to make any changes to the system.  There is a fear that if there are changes, things will be worse, so it is better to do nothing and just keep complaining about life.

This breaks my heart, because I know that on the individual level most people ARE caring, wanting to do the right thing.  We take casseroles to the neighbors when they are sick or have had a loss.  We pay for the person in line behind us at the drive through, just to make someone's day a little better. Some of us ask the homeless what they would want if they could have anything for Christmas...and then get them those things.  There are moments of beauty in our country and our world, moments that serve to remind us all that there ARE good people, there is a sense of community out there.

Unfortunately, however, these moments are special just because we don't see enough of them, at least on a scale that makes a large difference to the whole.  Helping others on an individual basis is wonderful, and something we should all strive to do, but the thing is that when we work together to make positive changes, our power is exponentially increased.  We just can't seem to get to the point where that increase of ability weighs more on the scales than "What's in it for me?".

“They are Man's and they cling to me, appealing from their fathers. This boy is Ignorance and this girl is Want. Beware them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased.” 
― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

Ignorance and Want define our country right now.  Willful ignorance, a choice made by many to deliberately ignore what his happening out of any number of emotions is our bane.  We turn a blind eye out of fear that it could be us.  We look away from injustice because we don't dare admit that it could be us on the receiving end next if we speak up.

The problem is that if we don't speak up and start righting the wrongs that surround us, then we are not just observers, but we are part of the problem, a BIG part of the problem.  There's only one way to make the world better, and that is by rolling up our sleeves and putting in the work to do so.  If that means making the time to work a soup kitchen, then make the time.  If that means those who have more wealth need to put that money to good use rather than hoard it, then they should do so.  If it means running for office and remembering WHY you did so once you're in, then make that commitment.

“Men's courses will foreshadow certain ends, to which, if persevered in, they must lead," said Scrooge. "But if the courses be departed from, the ends will change.” 
― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

It is our decision whether to strive to change the end of the story.  Working together we can change it for the better for everyone, not just ourselves.  But we have to find the courage to face our fears.  We have to find the resolve to keep going even when our own lives are better, because there are others who have not had that good fortune yet.  There is nothing we cannot achieve if we put aside selfishness and we share all that is good with those around us.

Change the story, America. Become everything that the Founding Fathers envisioned we COULD be, and put the caricature that we are now to rest once and for all.  Let's re-write the ending...together.

Hey, the Universe is knocking!

Sometimes life just continues on its merry way, dull and stable, without much variance in happenings.  You go to work, you come home, make dinner, hop online for a bit or play computer games or work on a hobby.  The weekends come and you go to a movie or meet friends for dinner.  It is regular, unremarkable, and you pretty much know what is coming day to day.

Then there is my life.

First, I have the brilliant idea of starting my own business, and trying to juggle that with a 40 hour a week job.  After a couple of years, I realize I can't maintain that pace any more, so I quit my job and focus on my business full time while relying on The Husbeast to bring home a steady income.  Suddenly there is a rotten year, specifically rotten sales for a season.  It wasn't really anyone in particular's fault, just a Perfect Storm of Bad Things (tm) including a chaotic election.  People got scared, decided it was best to just hang onto their money to be safe, and stopped buying things.

At the end of all of that, I came to the conclusion that my baby, my business, it wasn't viable at this point in time, and I announced a hiatus.  For a time we survived on The Husbeast's salary, but things were tight.  I applied for a government job, but after almost two months I still hadn't heard anything other than a tentative offer contingent upon passing a security check, so I figured I had somehow failed the security check but couldn't for the life of me figure out why.  I've passed them before for banks I worked at, but hey, maybe they have different criteria, right?

I turned my attention to other opportunities, and was just about to start applying for various positions when The Husbeast came home three hours early on a Friday.  Anyone who has worked in corporate America knows what that means, and they're right.  He had been let go.

Now we are both unemployed, with a mortgage payment due, not to mention other frivolous bills like utilities, gas for the vehicles, and groceries.

But The Universe had a plan.  Or at least, it knew that we'd had plans we have talked about for over 20 years, and it decided that now is the time for us to move forward with them.  It punctuated the lesson by having me receive an email stating that I was totally qualified for the government job, and they would have hired me...but...they had filled the positions, but please try to apply again!  (In other words, my file sat on someone's desk too long and there are no jobs left.)   I actually started laughing when I read it because it became really obvious to me that The Universe has decided this is the direction we shall take, will we or no.

We now begin the next chapter of our lives, and we begin by being Stupid.  Not just stupid, but Stupid.

Who needs money to retire on anyway, right?

So here we go, moving forward with our Big Idea.  We've started researching, are prepping to write a business plan, and are talking with Paul The Financial Wizard about ways to survive until things are up and running.

I know this is cryptic, but we're kind of trying to keep things mellow until we're ready for the big announcement.  Most of the people who read this blog will have a good guess about what we're doing, but still, let us keep the illusion that people will be surprised.  **LOL**

And if you have any extra, send us some luck and good wishes, please. :)